EasyBlog

Ever walk on a track? It’s kind of fun, in that you get halfway around and even if you want to stop, you can’t, because you still have to walk back the other way to get to your car. Plus having a mindless route — it’s walking around in a circle, for heaven sakes — makes it easier to think about other things besides where you’re going. You can notice the trees, or the weather, or the other people exercising around you. And of those, there are always certain predictable types: the parent maneuvering the huge stroller like a DC-10 coming in for a landing, the athletic competitor zooming past on a training run, the elderly person listening to the ball game on their progress-be-damned transistor radio as they walk slowly around in a windbreaker and sensible slacks.

A question for people who aren’t organically nuts (because bless their souls, that’s a whole ‘nother ball game): did you ever notice how the negative voices inside your head can talk louder than the positive ones? Thoughts telling us “you look fat,” “you sound stupid,” or “she/he likes you? Well, just look at his/her outfit … that explains a lot” can drown out any chance of spontaneity in ourselves, making a casual date with someone new feel forced and awkward. Chalk it up to post WLS jitters, but really, it comes down to one simple question: how many people live in your head?

I never ran track in high school; it seemed kind of redundant, trying to throw my teenage body over hurdles and things. I had enough of those set up inside my head; I didn’t need to go looking for more. But there is a concept from the sport I learned only later that you can apply to most anything, whether you’re an athlete or not. It’s called a running start, and particularly if you’re dating — especially if you’re new to it, after a long time out — you’d do well to learn it. And don’t worry; it doesn’t involve unflattering nylon shorts.

April is alcohol awareness month, and it is useful to recognize there are many similarities between the arduous recovery from alcohol abuse and the post WLS lifestyle. Both are difficult, both are life changing, obviously. However, it is also useful to recognize that excess weight, like alcoholism, is a family disease.

The state of being single, and the act of trying to “unsingle,” is hard at any weight. But for someone who has struggled with too many pounds and not enough love for themselves, dating — especially dating after WLS — can be even scarier. After all, we’re used to bad relationships: with food, with ourselves, with romantic partners who may reinforce, rather than fight against, an image of ourselves as unhealthy, unhappy … and unlovable.

Everybody talks about toxic ingredients: corn syrup, aspartame, palm oil or excess sodium…anything that somehow packs a food or beverage with extra consequences for the unsuspecting consumer. The warnings about these substances generally are not to avoid them at all costs, but simply to be aware of them, and to limit your consumption as appropriate to your dietary needs.

What can be scarier than the first time with a new sexual partner? The first time after WLS with a new sexual partner! So if you find yourself in that situation, give yourself a pat on the back for doing things in a big way. You, my dear, are not a wimp. You are Superman (or Superwoman), and guess what? Courage looks great on you.

When you chase a dream, no matter what it is — losing weight or finding Mr. or Ms. Right, among them — you’re going to have setbacks. No one likes to talk about this part of the process. Indeed, no one likes to think about this part of the process. Nevertheless, these disasters are part and parcel of achieving any goal. Here are three strategies to keep in mind for those inevitable “throw up your hands” moments. Use them and pass them on!

For anyone today without a significant other, the internet can sometimes be seen as a giant singles bar, holding so much of the same promise — and awkwardness — that logging on can feel like you’re standing around in real time holding a diet soda and a cocktail napkin, smiling to no one in particular. Consider these two issues before you get started, and set yourself up for success.

So much of WLS is about quantitative change. A better weight. A better dress size/blood pressure reading/menu choice/BMI. Who can blame anyone then, for having trouble loving themselves unconditionally during this process? Weigh this, be this. Weigh that, and forget it — we’re gonna potato chip out alone with too many cats for the rest of our lives.