Does shopping for a swimsuit trigger a tidal wave of self-doubt?
Here are 7 tips to guide you to shore !
In my view, every bathing suit shop in the civilized world should be legally obliged to post one of those orange signs you see beside the doors of saunas. WARNING: Exit immediately if uncomfortable, dizzy or sleepy. Avoid if pregnant or in poor medical health. Bikini shopping in conjunction with alcohol or drugs may cause unconsciousness. By the time I found out, it was already too late. I was naked, weeping, red-faced and five-and-a-half-months knocked up, under the fluorescent lights of a fast-fashion change room on Oxford Street in London, England. A discarded pile of solid colour bandeau and triangle bikinis lay in a wilted pile beside me. No, it was not a good look. But then again, what was I thinking? Swimwear shopping is a self-esteem crapshoot at the best of times, let alone with a sore back, swollen tummy and bazooka breasts.
Since then, upon much sober reflection, I have compiled a list of wisdom gleaned from years of swimwear-shopping trauma. Whether you are a gangly tween contemplating your first padded two-piece or a post-partum mum longing to reclaim your inner Gidget, the following advice will help guide you seamlessly from change room to checkout.
Effective swimwear shopping, in my experience, is all about knowing and accepting your true body type, whatever that may be. For years, I lived in denial of the fact that my generous D cups were simply not cut out for simple string bikinis (imagine a banana split shoved into a tea cup), however much the classic three-triangle look suited my bottom half and minimalist taste. Then I discovered the bathing bra and panty sets at U.K.-based lingerie house Agent Provocateur. The retro Amylee two-piece comes in different colours and prints depending on the season, and supports me like the 34D I am.
#2 IT IS POSSIBLE TO CONCEAL YOUR WOBBLY BITS WHILST RETAINING YOUR SEX APPEAL.
Less has never been more than when it comes to swimwear. However, you shouldn’t underestimate the power of concealment when it comes to playing up your best assets on the beach (see #6).
#3 EXERCISE CAUTION WHEN MIXING AND MATCHING.
Stripes and solids, yes. Dots and stripes, OK. Paisley and Hawaiian florals? Only if you’re a Japanese art student on holiday in Ibiza.
